Mirror, Mirror on the wall...

Mirror, Mirror On the Wall

Have you ever done something you aren't proud of?

A couple weeks ago, I was running late to get my kids to school. My 10 year old daughter has become the queen of dilly-dallying (I swear just to watch my head explode) and I had forgotten I was out of gas.

I stopped into my regular gas station and (lo, and behold) guess what...they had changed the pumps. You know, to the new fancy kind with TVs.

Well, I have a hard time with change and find the idea that we need to watch TV (receive additional marketing input) while we pump gas depressing. So, I boil over from frustrated to irritated.

But I press on. No time to think about "what this world is coming to" right now.

I put in my card. Punch in my zip code. Load the nozzle into my card.

AAAAANNNNDDDDDD......

Get an error message.

Then, "Please see attendant."

GAH! I do not have time for this. If we had just kept the stupid "old" pumps (that weren't old), this would not be happening to me right now. Seriously! Can't a girl catch a break?

I try again. No luck.

SO I head inside to a line of people and a single cashier who is on the phone. (Obviously I'm not the only one having trouble. He must be on the phone with the company trying to get support).

I wait my turn. Impatient but quiet.

When it is my turn, I express my frustration and move on.

-----

Fast forward a few days. I need gas again. Not running nearly as late, but late enough. It happens again.

I won't go into detail about what I said either time because I am embarrassed. But I was irritable, unkind, and full of blame. (I did not yell or curse - not that it wasn't on my mind).

----

Fast forward another several days. I am not falling for this again. Out of spite, I venture out of my way to a different gas station.

And, guess what.

THE SAME THING HAPPENS!!!

And then I realize. I'm using the wrong zip code.

I try again with the correct zip code and everything works just fine.

And then it hits me.


Moral of the story....

There are plenty of lessons to learn from this experience (time management, vehicle maintenance, parenting, attitude adjusting, and gratitude all easily come to mind). But for me, the most important one was "Who am I? Who do I want to be? and How do I want to be perceived?"

I always pay at the pump. This gentleman has never met me before (nor anyone else in that store). This was an awful first impression. And, hopefully, not a good picture of who I really am.

Definitely not who I want to be. 

And so. Since then I've been looking harder at who I am and how I show up in the world. Not just when I'm running a meeting, marketing, coaching, or posting to social media...

But who I am when I don't think people are looking. When I don't intend to be noticed. When I'm "just" mom, or the lady in the checkout line, or the girl next to you in Jazzercise, or another car on the road....

What about you? Who do you want to be?




Thanks for being here.

Beth
www.secondnaturehealthcoaching.com